OK, I admit I was at the house. I was just passing and saw the door open and popped in. And yes I ate the porridge and may have accidentally broken one of their lousy chairs. Sure they were a bit angry when they came back and caught me napping in the kids bed, and we may have exchanged a few heated words, but you’ve got to believe me Inspector, when I left that place they were all very much alive. I’m telling you, as God is my witness, I know nothing about any poisoned pizza and three dead bears.
These things always happened to her. According to the story they weren’t due back yet. She was only half way through the porridge. She hadn’t yet got to the bit where she broke the chair or they found her in the youngsters bed. If only they’d kept to the script none of this would have happened. She’d panicked when Baby Bear had roared like that and shot him. When Mummy and Daddy Bear had rushed towards her she’d fired twice more. Looking at the bloody mess on the kitchen floor she wondered if she had time to finish the porridge?
“Forensics say it’s definitely a human thigh bone. Stripped bare of flesh. Found in a waste bin in the kids play area on the Eastleigh estate. Forensics also confirmed it belongs to the torso we found yesterday in the woods that back on to the edge of the estate.”
“How are we doing with identifying it?”
“One possibility sir. A young girl has been reported missing. Name of Goldilocks. Seems she was in the habit of visiting some bears living in a cottage in the woods. I’ve got men out there checking it now.”