Posted in Stories

Santa And The Delightful Mrs. Tidings

“Mission control here. Are you reading us? Come in, please. Mission control here……”

“I’m sorry ma’am we seem to have lost radar contact and he’s not answering his radio.”

“When was the last contact you had with them?”

“Just over an hour ago ma’am. They were heading down from Greenland  and were due to hit the UK mainland at 12.22am our time.”

“Any message?”

“He just said that everything was fine, ma’am. The weather was a little stormy, but nothing they couldn’t handle.”

“No hint of any problems then?”

“No ma’am nothing. Everything was going completely to schedule. I’m sorry ma’am, Mrs. Claus, but it looks like your husband may have crashed somewhere. Do you want me to scramble the search and rescue sleighs?”

“I suppose you’d better. That stupid man, why does he go and choose tonight of all nights to have an accident. Here we are the 25th of December, our busiest night of the year and he decides to go AWOL! You’d better have the backup Santa Sleigh primed, laden and ready to go, just in case.”

********

“Well, Rudolf looks like we’ve done it.”

“Yes boss, though your missus is going to be fuming if she ever finds out.”

“That’s your problem Rudolf, you panic too much. Relax, I’ve got the whole thing under control. She’s not an inkling of what’s going on.”

“I hope you’re right boss. I still thing you’re taking a big risk but I know you’re not going to change your mind.”

“You’re right there Rudolf. This is my big chance and I’m not going to let it slip away. By the way, how are your boys doing?

“They’re fine boss, though they’re getting a bit restless. They’re not used to all this hanging around, especially tonight. I’m a bit worried about old Prancer. He shouldn’t really have come out tonight, he’s got a horrible barking cough.”

“Tell them we’ll be off again soon Rudolf. In the meantime, I’ve got the pot boiling back there on the trivet. Why don’t you go and give your lads a nice hot cup of vanilla milk to keep them going?”

“Yeah, but what then boss? You know I’ve not been happy with this hare brained plan of yours. It won’t work you know. Old Mrs. Claus is going to find you and then heaven help us all.”

“There you go, panicking again Rudolf. Relax everything will work out just fine as long as you remember what you’ve got to do. Right, come on, time we were going. Mission Control will be sending out search parties soon.”

“So it’s Willows Crescent then is it, boss?”

“That’s right 72 Willows Crescent where the lovely, amorous Mrs. Tidings is waiting for me. Did I tell you she was a widow Rudolf?”

“Yes boss, lot’s of times.”

“Every year for the last 5 years she has been trying to persuade me to leave Mrs. Claus, retire and go and live with her and now that’s exactly what I’m going to do. I’m going to be so happy Rudolf. She’s everything Mrs. Claus isn’t. She’s kind, attentive and very good-looking. On top of all that she’s also a wonderful cook. Those full crusted mince pies she makes me every year are absolutely sublime. So rich and at the same time the pastry is soft and the flavour is so subtle.”

“They sound wonderful boss. She seems like a lovely lady this Mrs. Tidings. Hold on tight boss we’re here, 72 Willows Crescent.”

“Well done Rudolf. Pull up over by the chimney and let me off. You know what you need to do next?”

“Yes, boss. We fly over the Scottish mountains and drop a few of our presents down one of the steep slopes to make it look like we’ve had a crash. We then tell Mission Control that the snow storm got worse and in the poor visibility we had to swerve violently to avoid the mountain and that’s when you went over the precipice. We looked but couldn’t find any sign of you at all.”

“Excellent Rudolf. Now don’t forget when you get summoned to the Great Hall to tell your story to Mrs. Claus, remember to bow low and genuflect. You know what a stickler she is for correct etiquette. I’ll look out for you next year Rudolf. Have a good journey back.”

“Thanks, boss. Good luck with Mrs. Tidings.”

 

MikeJackson©2011

A Christmas story for this week’s wordle words at ‘The Sunday Whirl’. No poetry this week, instead I thought I would try a dialogue only story. The words were:

bark     December      subtle    vanilla      laden       inkling      genuflect    crusted      trivet      mission        precipice     amorous

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Author:

Now that I'm retired I have more time to devote to writing my blog and creating short stories.

16 thoughts on “Santa And The Delightful Mrs. Tidings

  1. Oh my, now my faith is really shattered, Mike!! Santa falling for old Mrs. Tiding??? … tell me it isn’t so, and I am just dreaming this nightmare ~~ :D!!
    Nice twist — but tsk tsk!!

    Like

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