Experimental Writing – Twitter Fiction + Haiku

Having looked at the great picture prompts from Indigo Spider’s ‘Sunday Picture Press’ I thought I might experiment. Below are two pieces linked to the picture. Both are a short 140 character (or less) story finished off with a 5-7-5 syllable Haiku. What do you think?

His daughter walked away lost in her happy thoughts. He was glad he hadn’t told her. He sat there, alone, lost in his own thoughts.

sat on a park bench
reeling from the shocking news –
she hadn’t noticed

 —-oooo—-

She walked through the park and smiled at his e-mail.  She never noticed the old man alone on the bench. The father she had never met.

smiling to herself
she checked his message again –
secret admirer

MikeJackson©2011

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15 thoughts on “Experimental Writing – Twitter Fiction + Haiku

  1. I really like this one. I like the mirroring, the above his and below hers, and all in poetic form! Impressive! One of the best yet.

  2. Hey, way to go! I’ve never attempted either of those.

    The first one really captivated me. I immediately thought, “He’s dying, and didn’t tell his daughter”.

    It’s something that I could picture myself doing…

I look forward to reading your comments

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